The comparison game in life and business is real, and it can be crippling. The truth of it is, it never fully goes away.

Someone else will always have more followers than you; someone else is always going to have nicer jewelry, a better-looking apartment, more money in their bank account, etc.

The key to moving through this is not to allow comparison to become why you never try or the reason you get all down on yourself, your effort, your life, your journey, and your worth. Your worth is not equal to the number of followers you have on social media or the money in your account. Period.

When you’re coming down with that comparison virus, here are a few vitamin-packed reminders to remedy it.

Social Media Has Filters For a Reason!

The work is not glamorous at times. Often it is not at all.

We share what we want the world to see. Not to say it is lying, but it is seen through a lens. A small part. A cropped view of life. A highlight reel.

This is a gentle reminder that whatever you see on social media is what the individual has chosen to let you see. There is likely much more going on underneath.

Social media is a wonderful way to connect with people and share our experiences; just don’t let the fun of it get taken away from you by obsessing over how you compare to others and their lives.

Remedy: Your remedy for social media comparison is to remember that filters are not reality and social media is not life.

Success is Relative

We all want different things in and out of life when it comes to success. We all don’t want to run multi-million dollar companies or jet-set all over the world. You do not have to kill yourself trying to reach that six-figure trap that so many marketers try and sell as the pinnacle of success.

Success is personal, and it is relative. Success to you may mean that you can stay home and raise your children and work part-time. Success to you may mean getting promoted in your current job and being an amazing leader. Success to you may mean being able to put money away for a holiday. Success to you may mean running your own empire and becoming the next Oprah. Whatever it is, define it for yourself and work towards that.

Don’t let anyone else define success for you. I get my clients to spend some time on this, and most other biz coaches will as well. So when you see people bragging about their six-figure business on Facebook (usually through ads trying to sell you something), or you see a fellow biz friend land a book deal, remember that this is how they are milestoning their success. This is how they are defining it and viewing it as. You don’t have to write a book or hit six figures if you don’t want to.

Remedy: Your remedy for success shaming is to get a clear vision of your version of success and use that as a roadmap. If something comes along that is not going to get you there, you can say no, knowing that you are not missing out; you are just staying true to your own vision.

Don’t Compare Your Weaknesses with Someone Else’s Strengths

I can’t sew for shit. I wish I could. I am addicted to Project Runway, and I would love nothing more than to create anything like what the contestants can. What an amazing way to express your creativity. Knowing it is not a strength of mine, why would I compare the very few things I have ever been able to sew with runway couture? Madness right.

Sure, I could take lessons and spend years learning the craft and get better, but it does not come naturally for me. But writing does, singing does, talking does, photography does. I would rather spend my time on the things that I am GOOD at naturally than knock my head up against the wall doing something I am not great at and being Meh at it.

If I am not strong at something in my business, I have some options, get good at it, get someone who is good at it to hire to do it for me, or don’t do it all together. Depending on how critical it is to my business will depend on the choice I make. But you don’t have to do anything and be good at everything! What a boring world we would live in.

Ask yourself, are you doing the same thing in your business? Are you trying to compare your weakness with someone else’s strength? Cut yourself some slack.

Remedy: Your cure for your weak link criticism is to focus on what you are good at and enjoy and make a plan for everything else that is mission-critical.

Your Path, Your Journey

No one else will experience their road to success the same way; we all have different lessons to learn and obstacles to overcome. No one ever made it overnight, either. Accepting that your path to success will be as unique as you are is a powerful step.

We often come up against the same problems and face many similar fears, but our strengths, beliefs, lessons, and backgrounds are going to see that we challenge and face them differently.

Life is too short and WAY too precious to care so much about the end game of $$$ to hate every minute of it. To not take some time off and to treat the journey as less important than the goal.

When you find yourself looking at someone who has not had the same obstacles as you in reaching their goals, it can be hard not to get resentful and feel blocked. I am not talking about the real issue of equality that people face because that can be institutionally set up for people to fail. I am more talking when a friend lands a big gig on their first try while you are still waiting for that to happen after many attempts.

Remedy: Enjoy the journey and when it is hard, refocus your energy to level up from your mistakes and struggles. Where ever you can. I have had this way of thinking for a long time. The Goddess never gives me anything I can not handle, I can see it as a challenge and opportunity, or I can let it derail me. Ultimately the choice is mine, and so is my path.

When you are GREEN

We are only human, and we are going to get jealous from time to time. A mantra that I have used so many times that has really helped me is one I heard from Sarah Hart, I am paraphrasing here, but she says ‘When you see someone else’s success, it is really the person showing you what is possible for you.’

Jealousy creates blocks, not opportunities.

Remedy: “Thank you for showing me what is possible for me and my business.”

What a powerful, quick way to turn something that could see you spiral into a comparison coma into something that you see as an opportunity for you.

So much better than allowing the Green-Eyed Monster to possess your body. Jealousy creates blocks, not opportunities.

I hope you have found this valuable, even if there was just one thing you can take away from this today.