Hi Tarot lovers, we are at part 3 of Love and the Tarot. Today, I’m discussing expectations and sharing a new Tarot Spread for the lessons we face in our relationships. If you missed Part 1, it was about the ideas of soul mates, “the one” and twin flames, Tarot Cards for Romantic Love and Card Combinations for Lovers. Part 2 covered getting out of your own way, aligning yourself for the right relationship and the best questions to ask the Tarot about love. As with everything that I share, take what resonates with you and leave the rest.
Relationship Expectations Vs Having Standards And Boundaries
Just so we are coming at this from a level playing field of understanding expectations, as defined by Google dictionary, it is “a belief that someone will or should do something.” There are many kinds of expectations: cultural, social, and personal. However, they can be really damaging for the most part, especially if they are never shared and then not met. People end up not talking or expecting other people to read their minds. Seriously, we can fuck up perfectly good relationships by acting like entitled children. Here is where having expectations about another person and your relationship will shoot you in the foot. An expectation is projecting your will onto someone else to act or conform in a certain way. Which, when we look at this under the laws of magical working that I live my life under, is a no-no—that pesky free will.
Having standards and boundaries is you holding space for yourself and allowing yourself to have the power to accept or decline an offer or action. You totally get a say in how you are treated in a relationship. Sometimes, though, when something happens in a relationship and is talked about right away, it can be resolved, and future repeats are avoided. Now I’m talking about date nights, whether you like to have them call you when they are away before you go to bed etc. Little things often make or break relationships. I’m going to say it again; I’m NOT talking about harmful or abusive behaviour. If that shit shows itself in someone, I’m out of there, and I do not look back. I have had experiences around this myself, and I did walk away.
Communication is so fucking important. I can not overstate this enough. If you want someone to help you, say it. If you would like an agreement to be made in your relationship or household, SAY IT. Allow the other person to have input too though. NO TAROT READING IS GOING TO FIX YOUR RELATIONSHIP IF YOU AREN’T TALKING TO EACH OTHER. This is in all caps because I want to literally yell this on my apartment rooftop. I will sling cards for clients all day, but the people involved in a relationship have to be the ones doing the work.
So now that I have talked about expectations, I want to share a new Tarot Spread I created for people who feel like there is something lingering from the past relationships that are hanging over them or repeating in their current or is blocking them from finding someone new.
When you are shuffling your deck for this reading, I recommend that you focus on the relationship where you feel you got stuck. Then when you are ready, cut your deck and select your cards in your usual manner.
- What is the lesson in this relationship for me?
- What am I potentially carrying from this relationship?
- What do I need to let go of from this relationship?
- What is blocking me from finding new love?
- What do I need to forgive?
- What do I need to work on for my self-love?
I would love to hear your experiences with working with this Tarot Spread if you use it and what your thoughts are on this series. Also, do you want me to talk more about Love and the Tarot? Are there any questions about Love and the Tarot that you would like me to cover? Let me know in the comment section below.