So many people come to the Tarot for advice and predictions on their love life. I find love readings to be an incredible opportunity for transformation and healing and today I’ll share some of my about reading the Tarot for love and romance.
This is a longer post with 3 separate videos. Here’s what we’ll cover:
- Aligning yourself for the right relationship
- How to get out of your own way
- The best questions to ask the Tarot about love
- Relationship Expectations Vs Having Standards And Boundaries
- Lessons in Love Tarot spread
- Extra Resources for Tarot and Love
In Part 3 I will be discussing expectations and sharing a new Tarot Spread for the lessons we face in our relationships.
As with everything that I share, take what resonates with you and leave the rest.
Soul Mates: Can I have a tracking number, please?
Many questions from people are framed around finding the ‘one’ or their soulmate or their twin flame. In a nutshell, a soulmate can be seen as someone who is a perfect match for you romantically and a twin flame is someone who is a reflection of who you are. Both of these connections usually come with a sense of immediate bond and recognition and can be intense. These two connections are totally different kinds of relationships but are often desired by people who are seeking love.
I believe we can have more than one soul mate because they may be fulfilling different soul contracts or agreements with us. I believe that there is no real such thing as the ‘one’ in that there is never just one person. As we shift and change and grow, our ‘one’ may change too, whether that means we are in a relationship with them and are evolving with them, or moving and expanding so our one moves. For example: I was totally in love with the person I was in my first serious relationship. We were together for 5 years. He was the ‘one’ for me at that time. He wouldn’t be now.
Again, this is how I see things. The person you are reading cards for also has their own way of looking at these concepts. Keep that in mind. I will often mention how I see love when I am reading the cards. Why? Because I get so many emails from clients worried that they have missed out on true love because the one somehow got lost in the mail.
On a spiritual level, I don’t believe that and I want to empower people to build and co-create the life they desire, so before I even start shuffling for them, I want to let them know that their reading is going to be about helping them find the one that is right for them and for the kind of relationship they are desiring, rather than praying on their fears that they missed out. (More about that in other parts of this series.)
Tarot Cards for Romantic Love
I believe that all Tarot cards have something to teach us about love and have messages of love. If romance and love are your subject and context, you can read each card within that context. This is one of the reasons I wrote my Modern Love Tarot and Bad Bitches Tarot guidebooks the way I did.
There are however cards and card combinations that are some of my key cards that I look for in a romance reading. They are the cards that indicate to me that my client is on the right track in finding love.
Major Arcana cards have so much weight in a reading I always pay attention to the cards that surround The Lovers. You can find out a lot about the future of the relationship with the cards that are around this one. Court cards next to this card often tell me about the Lover that is coming into my client’s life.
I usually see this card as more of a self-love card. Most of the time when this card comes up in a reading, it is like a sign from the universe that now is a really good time to start getting out there and meeting people. Aces are potential.
They are the gift from the universe that we need to act on so that manifests in our hot little hands, or in this case, our sexy pants! It’s the time when we feel good about love and optimistic about our suitors.
It’s also the honeymoon period of love; where you can’t keep those sexy pants on, and go off the grid for a while.
There is a reason for this. Lovers come and go, but with a true connection, sharing of space and commitment, the Two of Cups can really go the distance. The Two of Cups shows that there is a genuine back and forth of love and affection. There is also not an Angel melding like we see in a number of The Lovers cards.
If you are looking for love, marriage or long term commitment, cohabitation, family and just general all-around emotional fulfillment, this is the card you want to see. It’s a wonderful card for committed love and a happy relationship. The feeling of togetherness is strong, and there are smiles all around!
It’s also a great sign for new relationships as it indicates there are mutual feelings of interest and potential for things to go well.
A hot date, or five! A new love adventure and a new suitor. This is the Romantic in my court card archetypes, so whenever this hot little number shows up in a love reading, someone is about to get romanced!
There is also the possibility for love to happen or the cementing of an existing love. The both of you may be swimming in fantasies about one another.
Tarot Card Combinations For Love
Here are some of my go to Tarot Combinations for love and what they usually mean:
- Two of Cups + Four of Wands – Wedding bells baby! (If weddings are your thing.) Living together and building a life.
- The Lovers + The Page of Cups – Usually signifies a pregnancy.
- The Ten of Cups + The Ten of Pentacles – a solid relationship that is going to go the distance and leave a legacy for the next generation
- The Ace of Cups + The Knight of Cups – a summer lover or a short term Love. Meaningful sure; lasting, no.
As I mentioned before, all Tarot cards and especially those in the Cups suit have Love meanings. These are some of the most important signposts in my Tarot Practice when it comes to finding love and new love!
There are plenty of combinations and cards that talk about keeping, building and working through the hard parts of love. But that is for another time.
Do you even know what you want in love?
I’m not talking about the expectations your family has of you. I’m not talking about accepting some bullshit excuse for love because you are afraid of being alone or missing out. I mean do you KNOW in your core what you want in love? When it comes to love, I believe (and this is totally the witch in me talking) that we will manifest what we believe we are worth and what we want.
Now, I know that there are just some shitty things that happen, and I will never, ever say to someone who has experienced abuse in a relationship, gaslighting and any form of assault that they have manifested that. Ever. People who abuse often find people that they can manipulate and create horrible environments, just like a predator going after its prey. People and relationships are complex, psychology is complex, and I will never paint something that is individual and complex with a simple broad stroke.
What I mean about manifesting what we want when we work with active manifestation (spellwork, prayers, however, you do your magical thing) allows you the time and space to know clearly what you really want. Knowing yourself is so blinking important.
A wise woman once told me (I’m talking about my Mum here) that there is more than one kind of partner you will likely have in your life. There is your first love, your unrequited love (I could write all day about this BS), the love you marry and have kids with, and the love you grow old with. They can be the same person, but sometimes they are not.
Even knowing what kind of love you want will help eliminate all of the things you don’t want, and that is just as important. If you are looking for love, the next time you begin the journey, ask yourself these questions and see if they help. You know I’m all about journaling, so writing it out can be really great.
- What type of relationship do you want?
- What are some of the things you would share as passions and interests?
- What are you looking for in a relationship?
- How does this relationship feel?
Now you know what you want.
Get out of your own way
When people come into your life, and it starts to feel like the opposite of all of the things you just wrote about, when the Tarot tells you over and over again to walk away (you can’t ignore that Eight of Cups forever), love yourself enough to do it. There are, of course, times when you may find that you are being a little picky or straight up have way too high an expectation for a new romance. I will talk about expectations and how they can kill a relationship before it even begins in the next part of this series. But for now, just being aware of your worth and not accepting the things that are not what you really want out of fear is a good place to start.
Asking the right questions for love readings
So you know you want to find your Knight, King or Queen (or all three) in shining armour, but you have no idea how to ask the Tarot for some help hunting the sucker down. I’m here to help. Call me Tarot Cupid. When it comes to questions and the Tarot, at times, I do re-word them for my clients. I will never not answer a question for them because that is what I’m being paid for. But if the question is a closed question, I work a custom spread around it and look at fleshing it out for more information for my Tarot querent. Of course, these are just suggestions. You can change the wording of them if you like or create your own. However, I do hope you find them helpful.
- Closed question – Will I find my soulmate? Open question – What can I do to bring my soulmate into my life?
- Closed question – Am I doomed in love? Open question – Where are my love blocks, and how can I move forward?
- Closed question – Is my current love my soulmate? Open question – How can I get the most out of my current relationship?
- Closed question – Will I get married? Open question – What does the future hold for my romantic love life?
- Closed question – Will my ex come back to me? Open question – Is there any unfinished business between x and y, and what needs to be released?
As I mentioned before, I always answer the question asked by my clients. These additional questions help build a more empowered and full narrative and reading for people.
Relationship Expectations Vs Having Standards And Boundaries
Just so we are coming at this from a level playing field of understanding expectations, as defined by Google dictionary, it is “a belief that someone will or should do something.” There are many kinds of expectations: cultural, social, and personal. However, they can be really damaging for the most part, especially if they are never shared and then not met. People end up not talking or expecting other people to read their minds. Seriously, we can fuck up perfectly good relationships by acting like entitled children. Here is where having expectations about another person and your relationship will shoot you in the foot. An expectation is projecting your will onto someone else to act or conform in a certain way. Which, when we look at this under the laws of magical working that I live my life under, is a no-no—that pesky free will.
Having standards and boundaries is you holding space for yourself and allowing yourself to have the power to accept or decline an offer or action. You totally get a say in how you are treated in a relationship. Sometimes, though, when something happens in a relationship and is talked about right away, it can be resolved, and future repeats are avoided. Now I’m talking about date nights, whether you like to have them call you when they are away before you go to bed etc. Little things often make or break relationships. I’m going to say it again; I’m NOT talking about harmful or abusive behaviour. If that shit shows itself in someone, I’m out of there, and I do not look back. I have had experiences around this myself, and I did walk away.
Communication is so fucking important. I can not overstate this enough. If you want someone to help you, say it. If you would like an agreement to be made in your relationship or household, SAY IT. Allow the other person to have input too though. NO TAROT READING IS GOING TO FIX YOUR RELATIONSHIP IF YOU AREN’T TALKING TO EACH OTHER. This is in all caps because I want to literally yell this on my apartment rooftop. I will sling cards for clients all day, but the people involved in a relationship have to be the ones doing the work.
Lesson in Love Tarot spread
I created this Tarot spread for people who feel like there is something lingering or repeating from past relationships which are creating blocks from finding a healthy relationship..
When you are shuffling your deck for this reading, I recommend that you focus on the relationship where you feel you got stuck. Then when you are ready, cut your deck and select your cards in your usual manner.
- Lesson: What is the lesson from past relationships for me?
- Baggage: What am I potentially carrying from these relationships?
- Release: What do I need to let go of from these relationships?
- Block: What is blocking me from finding new love?
- Forgive: What do I need to forgive?
- Self Love: What do I need to work on for my self-love?
Extra Resources for Tarot and Love
I hope you enjoyed this article and the videos. If you want to keep exploring Tarot and Love, here are some ways to do that.
- Check out 5 Tarot Relationship Spreads for Every Stage In Your Life
- Grab The Modern Love Tarot. The guidebook includes card meanings for 6 types of relationship status and it comes with free access to the Modern Love Tarot companion course on Tarot Readers Academy.
- Take the free Journey Through The Cups challenge – sign up below!
Free 14 Day Tarot Love Challenge
Explore Your Relationship With Love Using The Cups
I would love to hear your experiences with working with this Tarot Spread if you use it and what your thoughts are on this series. Also, do you want me to talk more about Love and the Tarot? Are there any questions about Love and the Tarot that you would like me to cover? Let me know in the comment section below.